One Long Year

So, it has been a year since my wife and I agreed that it was time to cut our losses and end the marriage.

One long year.

No papers signed yet, no agreements formally made, but a framework is developing, and a new relationship is emerging.

Yet today, I cannot feel anything but the remorse and the sense of failure at not being able to overcome the issues that split us up.

Last night, I recalled how drunk I got at the Ginger Man. I recall how ashen faced and dour I must have seemed walking in, asking for a beer and bourbon and my friend the bartender knowing...knowing that something was in fact wrong.

But my future ex-wife and I promised each other we would do things right...we have a daughter, after all, and her feelings are more important than our own, and I would not do what my parents did...I would not make her an emotional pawn in my own psychodrama.